Getting To Know Each Other Better

Our DIL Kristi (the one carrying our twin grandchildren) mentioned during their holiday visit to us that she and our son Brian bought a book with questions for couples and they use it to get to know each other better.

My Beloved and I liked the idea and found a book called “365 Questions for Couples” by Michael J. Beck. We took it on our Date Night last week and asked each other questions from it over part of dinner.

We asked each other perhaps 5 questions each–the same questions, and took turns answering them. After 33 years of marriage we know each other quite well, so we were surprised at how much we learned from the answers to those five questions. (That’s how I learned how much she learned from me .

We found the experience to be informative, interesting, and entertaining, and plan to do it again soon.

Love,
Russ

Posted in Communicating, Love, Marriage, Relationship Lessons Learned | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

Isn’t great love truly extrordinarily wonderful? It is as if experiencing a miracle and a thing of great beauty at the same time. Sometimes they are based on great decisions, and sometimes on small decisions made a great number of times.

Russ

billgncs's avatarbwthoughts

He was the grandson of a warlord but now a man of modest means. She came from the elite of a middle eastern state,

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Context Is Everything

While waiting in the Urgent Care facility for my Mother-in-Law to be checked out after her bad fall down the escalator, a woman seated just two seats away from me was talking quite loudly into what appeared to me to be a iPod Nano with wires on each side of it.

I began feeling somewhat irritated as the woman made call after call, each of them quite loud.

Although I attempted to tune her and her calls out, they were loud enough that I–and probably most of the people in the large waiting room–couldn’t help but hear what the calls were about. She had cut her hand and had to have it stitched up, but her two elementary school children were about to be let out of school. She normally picked them up, and was trying to find someone who she knew and trusted–and that the school knew and trusted–to pick them up instead.

I briefly thought to offer to pick her kids up for her but quickly dismissed the idea. I couldn’t leave my in-laws, and even if I could, there is no way a mother is going to let a strange man go pick up her kids.

I certainly could understand why she was making so many calls, but why did she after to be so loud? She seemed concerned but not frantic and there didn’t seem to be stridency in her voice just yet.

Then I heard someone ask her when she was between calls about the device that she was talking into. She explained, “I’m deaf. I need this device to be able to hear my cell phone.”

Oh.

Now I understood, and felt bad that I’d been irritated by her volume level.

Context is everything.

This story has a happy ending. (My stories nearly always do, as I love happy endings.) I heard that she found a neighbor who would pick them up in time.

I also noticed three coincidences:

Both she and my MIL were there due to a cut hand.

Her neighbor is about the same age as my MIL.

Her neighbor and I have nearly identical surnames (hers had an “R”) and both are somewhat unusual names.)

Coincidence? Perhaps. Perhaps not, but interesting to me nonetheless…

Russ

Posted in Attittude, Awareness, Children, Parenting, True Stories I've Written | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

The Phone Call

Sometimes things can change in an instant. One moment I was watching the U.S. market wind down, and the next…

The phone call came in at about 12:45pm today. A woman who identified herself as the manager of (a major retailer of home goods) said my mother-in-law (MIL)–who is in her 80’s–had fallen from the top of their escalator to the bottom floor. I knew the store and that the escalator was tall and steep with many moving jagged metal sharp-edged stairs.

She quickly added that my MIL had cut her hand and was in a wheel chair, but seemed to be otherwise ok, but would I please come drive her and my father-in-law (FIL) to an urgent care facility or to their home. (My MIL still drives, but my FIL stopped driving several months ago. My MIL was too shaken up too safely drive home.)

I rushed to the store and found her in a wheel chair and him sitting in a folding chair next to her at the bottom and slightly to one side of the escalator. The store was above them but they chose to stay where they were in the lobby until I arrived.

Considering what she had been through, my Mother-in-Law seemed to be in remarkably good shape and spirits. She’d been very lucky because she’d been wearing a puffy down coat and protective shoes, both of which apparently absorbed much of each impact on the way down.

Three hours later, the urgent care facility had bandaged her hand–it hadn’t needed stitches–and said that she appeared to otherwise be perfectly fine.

We all laughed at the adventure as I drove them home. I cracked, “You bounce well!” and she said, “I guess I do!”

Russ

Posted in Adventure, Family "Fun", True Stories I've Written | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

These are GREAT! Thank you for sharing them, Judy. The first one looks EXACTLY like my dog Duke.
Russ

Judy's avatarA Daily Thought

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I love this post, and especially the poem that Ivon included with it, and most especially the part that says so wisely and eloquently:

We cannot eliminate hunger,
but we can feed each other.
We cannot eliminate loneliness,
but we can hold each other.
We cannot eliminate pain,
but we can live a life
of compassion.

ivonprefontaine's avatarTeacher as Transformer

When Kathy and I decided I would teach one more year, I wanted to make it the best year possible. I tired last year, was in physical pain, and it was difficult to be there for students as I wanted. I examined my life as Socrates suggested. I realized I focused on things I had little or no control over which is unlike me. I knew I wanted this year to be different and I worked hard the first 1/2 of the year in that respect. I remind myself I can only do what I am capable of doing. I stopped planning and organizing that which is not plannable or organizable and take a breath now and then. I choose to accept my life as it unfolds and as I author it in this moment. I owe this to the students and their families who support them and me.

Mark…

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Doggone Good News!

I just read the following and hope it is true:

AS OF TUESDAY , DEC 4, A BILL HAS BEEN PASSED BY THE US HOUSE AND SENATE THAT DECLARES THAT OUR MILITARY WORKING DOGS OF ALL BREEDS WILL NO LONGER BE CLASSIFIED AS “MILITARY EQUIPMENT” TO BE LEFT BEHIND IN FOREIGN LANDS…BUT AS MILITARY VETERANS. THESE DOGS NOW WILL BE RETURNING TO LACKLAND AFB , FOR THEIR SERVICES AS US HEROES. THEY WILL BE EVALUATED, AND RETRAINED AND RE-HOMED IF NEEDED

Russ

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I Believe

I believe
That caring
Is closer
To the norm
Than not
Sadly, so are
Fear and the feeling
Of powerlessness
If we empower
Those who care
And remove the reasons
For their fear
I believe
The world
Would improve
In many
Wonderful ways
–Russ Towne

Posted in Compassion, Fear, Making the World a Better Place, Poetry I Wrote | Tagged , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

“A Tale Of Two Townes”

My wonderful son Brian and delightful DIL Kristi just found out that they are having not one, but TWO, babies!

For those keeping score at home, that’s TWICE the number of grandkids that are now on their way! One each for MY Beloved and me! YIPPEE! We’ll still have to take turns holding our terrific first grandchild Thomas though– but fortunately he too is well worth the wait.

When Brian found out that he was about to become the father of twins, he quipped to Kristi, “The story of your pregnancy could be called, “The Tale Of Two Townes”.

Love,
Russ

Posted in Abundance, Children, Grandparenting & Grandkids, Humor, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 26 Comments

Head Winds

“When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.” – Henry Ford

I don’t think I’ve ever seen this quote before, but I like it.

It got me to thinking of the all the times of my greatest challenges, and how they did indeed lead to much of my greatest growth.

But it also occurred to me that often the growth happened later–sometimes decades later–than the big challenge(s) that led to that learning and growth.

An important lesson for me is that it pays to be patient and to continue attempting to learn lessons from challenges that are not only occurring but have already happened in my life.

I wonder how many more lessons I have yet to learn from challenges that have already occurred? I look forward to finding out!

Love,
Russ

Posted in Adversity, Challenges, Growth/Learning, Quotes I Love | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments