House Rules By Bran Scott

As most of you know, I’m a self-confessed slow learner in the school of life. Yet another example (sigh) is that I have been reading and enjoying FB posts from a dear friend named Bran Scott and often cracking up as he describes various aspects of his life including parenting, relationships, and living in the Southeast USA with his wife Elane and their young daughter. His posts are often hilarious. I’ve suggested that he write a book and hope he does. In the meantime–and here’s the slow-learner evidence–it eventually occurred to me that since I enjoyed reading Bran’s posts so much that you might enjoy them too. I asked for and received permission from Bran to share the post below. Please let me know what you think. If enough of you love it, I may be able to twist his arm to let me post more of them in the future.


Dear Friends and Relations,

In Elane’s absence this week, I have instituted four new house rules. While perhaps these were incidents limited to one particular person in my life, I am not taking any chances, and choose to distribute them widely.

Rule #1: You may not wake up at 6 in the morning, put on your 3-layered, sequins and faux-taffeta princess costume, complete with sparkly shoes and pointy tiara, and climb into my bed to snuggle me.

Rule #2: Having broken rule #1, you may not then poke me simply to see what happens (*poke* “Uhhgrr.” *poke* “UhGRRRR!” *poke* “UHRGRR!…Grh?” *poke* “whaza!?!” *poke” “What?! What is it? What?” (giggling) “daddy, you sound funny!”)

Rule #3: You may not prance around in front of me singing “follow the yellow brick road” at the top of your lungs as I attempt to find coffee.

Rule #4: When I have retreated into MY bathroom to scrape together some semblance of sanity, as I am shaving, you may not burst through the closed door, stop short, grab your nose and say, “whoa, daddy, you stink!”

Thank you for your understanding.



About russtowne

My wife and I have been married since 1979. We have 3 adult children and 4 young grandsons. I manage a wealth management firm I founded in 2003. My Beloved is a Special Education teacher for Kindergartners and First Graders. I'm a published author of 23 books in a variety of genres for grownups and children. In addition to my family, friends, investing, and writing, my passions include reading, watching classic movies, experiencing waves crashing on rocky shores, hiking in ancient redwood forests, and enjoying our small redwood grove and fern garden.
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18 Responses to House Rules By Bran Scott

  1. billgncs says:

    the best of memories….

  2. russtowne says:

    Yup! Bran is a wise and loving man–like you–and he understands the value of such experiences and memories. And, I suspect from having been there myself with my own children when they were young, that he’d also really appreciate being able to get little more sleep!


  3. utesmile says:

    Great , and funny! Children are much fun! 🙂

  4. willowdot21 says:

    Being a mum of only boys I am profoundly sorry that my husband escaped all that! loved it!!

    • russtowne says:

      I’m glad you loved it! And grateful that I got to have such wonderful experiences with my children, and now grandchildren. Some of my favorite moments and memories are of such things.

  5. He sounds like a great dad that his kids feel free to spend time in his company!

  6. Oh my talk about funny you should had asked about including a link to his blog

    • russtowne says:

      Good idea, Joanne. I don’t think he has a blog, but after your comment, I plan to ask him if he does, and if not, recommend that he create one.

  7. russtowne says:

    His writing makes me smile too.

  8. JanBeek says:

    I have a nephew whose daughter is the queen of tutus and sparkly shoes. I MUST pass this along to him. He’ll laugh as hard as I did, no doubt. We should all be so blessed, huh Russ? 0)

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