Someone once asked me.  In a hushed tone.  In the midst of a discussion about having been molested as a child:

“How can you be happy and be…..okay?’    She paused and said “when others can’t?”

I knew my answer mattered to her.  I knew it was important.  Though I did not know the depth of ‘why’ it mattered.  I assumed I knew why she was asking.  And I was wrong.

I felt I had to answer with care.  And without embellishment.

My answer:

“Because I decided to.”

My embellishment:

I wasn’t always okay.  I wasn’t always happy.    Looking back it seems like I made the decision to be okay and things changed.   Insert:  finger snap.   Like that.

It wasn’t that quick of a change.

It was gradual.   But it was consistent.  It was progressive.  And it was a very good decision.

I learned…