Nightmares and Dreams

I just realized that nearly all of my ‘dreams’ while sleeping are in fact nightmares–at least the ones I remember. I have them virtually every night, and usually remember at least the last one when I wake up. I can’t remember the last time I had a pleasant dream while sleeping. I don’t know why my brain treats me in such a way; I don’t have significant regrets, remorse, or guilty feelings.

Most of my nightmares are of times and places from twenty to forty years ago, and often involve school or jobs I hated early in my career. In the nightmares, I’m often looking for something (my classroom, locker, locker combination, my office, my car, or other things) and no matter how long or hard I look I’m never able to find it.

I’ve also noticed that I’ve never had a nightmare (of which I’m aware) involving my current career as an investment and wealth manager, not even during the extreme volatility of the Great Recession–an eleven-year window of no nightmares set in that timeframe.

I just realized something else: Although nightmares are part of my sleeping hours, I’m living a beautiful, beautiful dream while awake, and that makes me a lucky man indeed.

With Love,

About russtowne

I'm awed by the beauty of nature and the power of love and gratitude. Some of my favorite sensory experiences include waves crashing on rocky shores, waterways in ancient redwood and fern-filled forests, and rain. My wife and I have been married since 1979. We have 3 adult children and 5 grandchildren. I manage a wealth management firm that I founded in 2003. My Beloved is a Special Education teacher for Kindergartners and First Graders. I'm a published author of approximately 60 books in a variety of genres for grownups and children.
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14 Responses to Nightmares and Dreams

  1. Val Boyko says:

    Our dreams let our sub conscious show us what needs attention.
    At least that’s my take on it!
    It sounds like its time to be with what happened in the past.
    Let your mind go back there. Feel what needs to be felt. Let your heart be open.
    You are in a different place now and are ready to face what comes up.
    Recall those situations. Feel the discomfort and frustration, the disappointment and anger.
    GIve it all space. Tell it it is welcome now.
    Feel what has been waiting to be acknowledged.
    Then let the feeling and energy move through you.
    Let it go. It is no longer serving you and you can be at peace with it when you let yourself feel what wasn’t felt before.
    This may sound off the wall Russ. But it has worked for me and others wanting to find peace.
    Val x

  2. Aw geez Russ….beautiful indeed. đŸ™‚

  3. I’m certainly not an expert Russ… but you have so many things going on right now and have for some time now… that I think your subconscious it trying to ‘search’ and sort everything out… and the mind being so complex combining it with other prominent times in your life… You take everything in your stride in your waking hours…but maybe make up for in in your sleeping ones… (only a more)…. Diane

  4. bulldog says:

    Russ this often happens to me… but rather than to go back and try and analyse them I use them to show myself of how better off I am today and in a happier place than back then… why return to heart ache times? when blessed with the now and obvious happy times…

    • russtowne says:

      HMMM… Now that’s an interesting view of things, my friend. Focus on the happier times. I can also see the value in doing that. Thank you, bulldog.

  5. willowdot21 says:

    Apparently we only remember the dreams we have for Minute or less just before you wake, these dreams can often appear very long. So you may deal with your present and more recent past in earlier sleep time.
    Either way you look at it if you are living the dream you are blessed. Xxx

    • russtowne says:

      Thank you for the interesting information, Willow. Yes, it sometimes feels as though the nightmare lasts nearly all night. They sometimes even continue after I get to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. You are correct that I’m living dreams and am blessed. It’s why I’m such a grateful man.

  6. utesmile says:

    Living the beautiful dream is so much more important. I do hope the nightmares will disappear with time. Live now and enjoy the minutes you have now! Be happy in there! Russ, big hug!

  7. jbw0123 says:

    Have you ever kept a pen and notebook by your bedside, and written down your dreams as soon as you wake up? Sounds like you have a rich imagination, and a lot of interesting stuff going on in that subconscious. Combine that with a rich daytime life, you might have the makings of some unusual poetry and stories. Cheers!

    • russtowne says:

      Good idea! Some of my best creative seeds come the last minute or so that I’m in bed. I sometimes wake-up and lounge around for a few minutes, partly to see if any ideas come up for me. Thank you for your kind comment and suggestion!


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