In a comment to my most recent post, titled “Blindness”, a reader asked some great questions about what my thoughts were on the underlying message of the story and whether complete sacrifice equaled true love. I thought some of you might have interest in my reply:
Some of the underlying messages for me included:
If one sees with their eyes but not their heart, they are still blind.
Sometimes one can fall in love with someone whose heart is not able to reciprocate.
It can be painful and one can lose some of the best parts of themselves if they fall in love with someone who doesn’t have true love for them.
It is wise to grow in love with someone whose heart is ready and able to love them back just as passionately and faithfully.
As for your question regarding sacrifice and true love: I believe that true love doesn’t have to involve sacrifice at all (or loss that is greater than gain). For example, I only want one thing for everyone I love: Lasting joy. Hopefully, I’m a part of their lasting joy, but if I’m not, then it is best for them–and ultimately for me–to not be in their lives. I can’t imagine that true love would ever want anything different than that.
I believe there is a big difference between investing in the relationship (a gift one gives themselves as well as the other(s) in that relationship), and sacrificing for the other person. Resentment can set in and the relationship can be hurt if one focuses on the latter, and the latter will often result in winners and losers–and sometimes only losers. To me, the best chance of achieving a happy outcome for everyone is when everyone focuses on strengthening the relationship.
I don’t believe that love is blind. True love helps us to simply focus on the best parts of others, and to stay connected to the best parts of ourselves.